Essay On Value Of Forgiveness

I wrote this essay months ago for my English IV class when I was a Senior. It was a timed essay I did online and I got a 4 out 5 which isn't that bad. 

Hirap ka bang magpatawad? Bakit? Anong dahilan bakit hindi mo siya kayang patawarin? 

Siguro naman darating yung tamang panahon na kaya mo ng magpatawad . Sana maibigan mo 'to at mabuksan ang isipan mo na hindi masamang magpatawad. :)

Forgiveness is almighty. Throughout lifetime and through the journey of individuals life, forgiveness is a gift. It can be a choice or an emotional spirit however trying to forget something a person has done is not easy and simple thing to bury. Some people hold grievances and bitterness for years and others just cannot wipe out the situation especially serious incidents. Forgiveness is a dedication to an individual that he or she has been forgiven, a process of change and a new start. It is very significant to give a soul another chance, everybody make mistakes. Nobody is perfect. Learning to accept others flaws create a healthy relationships. Forgiving someone takes ability and willingness before you can totally say that you have forgiven a person. It is a process between the soul and mind. 

One of the reason why it is very important to forgive is because it is very difficult to grip hates and bitterness within our soul. It feels wonderful when a person is at peace with anyone not have to live each day of their lives worrying what a person has done to them. If someone is carrying grudges, they are only hurting themselves every time they focus on the particular object that happened to them. An excerpt from the Bible, “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” Keep in mind that everyone draw uncertain things because nobody is perfect. Let us learn to forgive so that our Father will yield our own sins. Importance of forgiving someone can heal an individual’s inner soul knowing that they finally released all the hates and burdens within them. This will help a person move on with their life. 

Another reason why should we forgive because it leads to a healthier relationships. Can you resist not to talk to your best friend who just did not make it to your party because he or she had to study for a test? A person who is very dear to you will make an amend to get your sympathy but if you are numb not to understand the situation, it will be very difficult to accept their sorry. Personally when someone has done me wronged, it will take several days before I make a remedy to them. It is not as easy to bury what they have done but analyzing the whole situation aid us realize that it is harder to lose someone who is very dear to you. Forgiveness is healing and a process of making things healthier. It is a way for people to learn all their faults and start anew. 

Forgiving someone else for the bad things that they have done to you may take years but it is a process that will help our soul heal from all the hatred that we have encountered. Forgiveness is a divine and should be granted. Within our soul and mind, there will always be a space for people’s mistakes, therefore, there will always be a chance to forgive them.

The importance of forgiveness

Forgiveness is part of the process of healing and letting go of the past.

Posted on December 12, 2016 by Lisa Tams, Michigan State University Extension

When two people are angry with each other, each side feels hurt by the other and would like to receive an apology. Unfortunately, many people believe that they “lose” by admitting they hurt the other person. So neither side apologizes and the mutual resentment continues indefinitely. It’s important to remember that you do not lose by apologizing and admitting that you have been hurting the other person. You win and so does the other person.

So what exactly is forgiveness?We have a lot of misconceptions about it. For example, that it means being weak, not demanding justice, excusing the reprehensible behavior, or letting oneself be treated badly. It’s not any of those things! Forgiveness means to cease to feel resentment against someone or something. It is very empowering to know that you can regain your sense of self. You can wake up each day without reliving the past, even though you won’t forget it.

Four myths about forgiveness

  1. Forgiving means forgetting. False! Your brain doesn’t stop remembering. Instead of dwelling on the past, you are now free to protect yourself and move on.
  2. Forgiving means you’re a pushover. Absolutely not! Forgiving puts you in a position of strength. You can still hold people accountable, but you take away that person’s power to hurt you anymore.
  3. Forgiving means you can’t get angry. Not true! You don’t excuse unkind, inconsiderate, selfish behavior nor minimize your own pain. You can’t change the past or predict the future, but you don’t have to suffer forever either.
  4. Forgiving means reconciliation. Not always! It just gives you emotional space to make decisions that are best for you. It helps you decide, with strength and confidence, what’s best for you. You can decide if you want to work things out, or just walk away or do something else.

Why should we forgive?

The Stanford Forgiveness Project has shown that learning to forgive lessens the amount of hurt, anger, stress and depression that people experience. People who forgive also become more hopeful, optimistic and compassionate and have enhanced conflict resolution skills. This research also found that people who forgive report significantly fewer physical symptoms of stress such as a backache, muscle tension, dizziness, headaches and upset stomachs. The act of forgiveness also increases energy and overall well-being.

How to forgive

  • Acknowledge the pain you feel and recognize who is responsible for causing that pain.
  • Express your emotions in healthy ways.
  • Release any expectations you have of righting the wrong that was done to you.
  • Be mindful of or restore your boundaries so that this doesn’t happen again. Remind yourself that people cannot give you what they don’t have. Remember what to expect of others.
  • Find new ways to get your needs met in the future.
  • Don’t say things like, “I’m sorry you feel that way.” This is not an apology, but a criticism.
  • Don’t make your apology conditional on the other person’s apology. “I’ll admit I was wrong if you admit you were wrong.” Just apologize for what you did wrong. If the other person wants to apologize back, it is their choice, but do not expect it.
  • Learning to forgive requires acceptance by acknowledging that what happened really happened, instead of wishing it were different.
  • Release the unhealthy attachment you previously maintained concerning how the other person behaves.
  • Reframe your life story and find meaning in the broken places. Redefine, recreate and restructure your life.

This article was published by Michigan State University Extension. For more information, visit http://www.msue.msu.edu. To have a digest of information delivered straight to your email inbox, visit http://www.msue.msu.edu/newsletters. To contact an expert in your area, visit http://expert.msue.msu.edu, or call 888-MSUE4MI (888-678-3464).

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